A story from Krishna Das
The love that I felt coming from Maharaj-ji when I was with him in India was so extraordinary and unusual because it kept flowing. It didn’t come to me if I was good, and it didn’t stop flowing to me if I was bad… and he knew everything. There was no way that I deserved this love. Of course, that’s the nature of Grace; no deserves it. That’s why they call it Grace. It comes to us when we least expect it – when we are more at the end of our rope and can’t see how we can go on anymore, we turn a corner and there it is. We trip and fall, and we’re in it. Grace surrounds us all the time… It is the true state of the Universe. As Suzuki Roshi said, “Come walk with me in the rain. But don’t hurry. It’s raining everywhere.”
What keeps us away from the gentle rain of Grace? It’s our endless obsession, all day long, with I, me, mine. We wake up in the morning and start writing “the movie of Me”: What am I going to do? Where am I going? How am I going to get there? Is this enough? Is it too much? What’s going to happen? What am I going to wear? How do I look? Does he like me? Why Not? All day long. The move of Me. We write it, direct it, produce it, and star in it. We write review that we read, and get depressed! Then we go to sleep and do it all over again the next day. I’ve seen it so many times. And still, every time I turn on the TV, there it is: me, myself and my stuff.
Gradually and inevitably spiritual practices like chanting remove this subjective version of life by slowly dissolving the attachments that keep us feeling separate from the people around us, and separate and cut off from the beauty that lives in our own Hearts. Everything we do in life is connected to everyone and everything else.
As Maharaj-ji said, “Only when God comes to reside in our hearts can we really serve people.” There’s a goodness, a beauty, and a love that lives in our own hearts.
~ Krishna Das (from book « Chants of a Lifetime », a lovely video conversation https://youtu.be/m946LhDQcoU)